God's Identity, Changing my Priorities

It is amazing how God speaks to us. . . I love it when things start lining up that are knocking on your heart (even though I wish he was more direct sometimes). As a new doc in my practice, I am still developing who "my" patients are- those patients who would say I'm their doctor, instead of that I was the one they saw last. Because of this and the nature of the practice, I am seeing quite a few physicals- anywhere from 2-8 in a day. And the vast majority of the physicals are women aged 30-55. So many of them come in wanting to know why they can't sleep, can't lose weight, etc. I ask most of them what they do for themselves. Many can't tell me. And most start crying when I start to talk about how as women, moms, wives, etc. we tend to do for everyone else 1st, and leave the leftovers for us. Interestingly enough, I think this is true spiritually also, we do everything on our "to-do" list 1st, leaving time for God rushed, and time for ourselves nonexistent. I am no exception in this. I am good about reading a devotion daily, working out 3-5 times a week, and picking up a book to read, but in general, I am not great at sitting down (as I type this I am standing ha!) and spending time with God refreshing me. The interesting thing is that most of our families could care less if our houses are clean (our standard of clean), or if the meal came from a box or from scratch. And yet, many of us, me included, place high standards on getting this all done, so that we collapse into bed at night exhausted not able to identify what we did to refresh ourselves that day. As a doc, I can give you a whole list of things this can do to you, but I won't. Mainly, I'm just working on it myself. I tend to be a perfectionist on many things, and have even struggled today with making sure I'm accomplishing everything on my "to-do" list today. But I started reading this really great book today, and I feel like God is really trying to work at changing my priorities and my to do list. One quote from the book (Becoming More than a Good Bible Study Girl) "If Satan can use our everyday experiences, both big and small, to cripple our true identity, [in Christ] then he render's God's people totally ineffective for the kingdom of Christ." I like it. I'm going to try and focus on what really matters, where my identity really lies, taking time for myself, and not beating myself up for not packing socks for a recent camping trip (Thanks Ran), or showing up to the park without shoes for my son (Thanks Jenna), or having my husband have to wait til 9 p.m. to eat dinner some nights (Thanks Babe) but focusing on spending more time with God, in his relaxing presence!

My true priorities- the boys (driving the project car!)

Too cute- he is not potty trained, but is sitting on the potty chair, diaper on, reading "How to Potty Train in a Day" :)

Beginnings. . . (Thanks Julie:))

It's official! I've actually been at my job almost a month- thus the lack of posting! I'm loving work, loving my schedule, and loving having time to be a mom! I'm still trying to figure out how to "schedule" or not schedule my time off, since I'm not used to having much! BJ and I are enjoying an occasional storytime at the library and trying to just relax on his "Mommy days." However, he is also enjoying his "Daddy nights" on Thursdays when Mommy works late and Daddy feeds him fast food and lets him play in the playplaces- so far Chik-fil-A is their favorite :) We've had some very busy weekends Brandon's mom came out for 2 weekends to spend time with BJ, we hosted a large baby shower, I ran a 1/2 marathon, BJ and I flew to Omaha for a weekend to celebrate the great marriages in my family (and their milestone anniversaries), I've worked 2 weekends, and we've had countless parties and dinners to attend. That makes us sound very popular, I'm not sure that is the case :) BJ and Brandon have been working on a deck and almost have the surface finished- next for the railing and stairs. BJ has been hysterical lately, here are a few stories to share:

The other night he was in his crib chatting instead of going to sleep, so I snuck up to see what he was doing and heard him singing "bus, shh, shh, shh, bus" which is his rendition of the "Wheels on the Bus"

We try to be clear in any location what he is and isn't allowed to play with and go around to identify what is "no" and what is "yes" (in terms of touching). He has started running around and passing the "no's" with a hearty "no" each time he runs by, but doesn't touch!

He has decided his cousins, Wolfgang, Katarina, and Isabella, and their parents are very fun, but has started referring to all of them as "Lella" until this morning when he shouted "Matt" when he saw Uncle Matt coaching on the football field. I think it hurts Katarina's feelings, but he'll soon be saying her name too.

He has routinely lifted his shirt to show us his "belly/panza" when asked, but has occasionally lifted up others shirts to help them find theirs too.

The best of all is his hugs, he routinely gives Mommy and Daddy hugs when asked, that are so sweet! We are so blessed by our sweet little BJ!

"Foreman BJ"

"I'm on the phone, Mom"

Chilling on the airplane to Omaha, likely his last flight for a while, since he has to have a ticket after age 2.

More summer fun!

So I think I've officially lost count on days, so I'll just post more from our 2nd and 3rd weeks of summer fun!

More time at the pool. . .

Playing in the waiting room of the pulmonary clinic . . . hey, it's still fun!

Playing in the backyard pool

On the train with Nicholas and BJ at Airplane park

On the train!!!

Biking to the park with Mommy!

Backyard Panera picnic!

Comparing BJ's hand to the gorilla's!

The park in our pj's!

Fun Summer Pics

BJ and I have been having a blast while I'm off on my mini summer! Here are some pics from our adventures!

Day 1: Wash Park

Picnic Lunch

Slides!!
He picked out his own hat!
Feeding the ducks!

Day 2: The zoo with friends Issac and Silas: The Carousel Before the Ride Started

During the ride

With Issac in a covered wagon (sorry for the finger Issac!)

Day 3: Helping uncle Matt and Daddy build a deck in the backyard with the "shobel"

Day 5: At the park with our friend Nicholas

Day 6: At the Pool with Nicholas

Day 7: Model Train show (hard to get pics while holding a 21 month old and trying to make sure he doesn't touch the trains!)

Day 8: Running errands to go to Steamboat!

More Steamboat pics

These are from my phone, so bear with me. Working on his book from Aunt Miranda on the drive.

Drinking a Limeade at an old fashioned soda fountain.

Riding the horse in front of F.M. Light and Sons.

Steamboat Fun!

Some quick pics from our recent vacation to Steamboat, so fun!! Lots of hiking, swimming, naps, etc.

View from the top of Mt. Werner

Hiking takes it out of you!

Swimming with Daddy!

Hiking!

At Fish Creek Reservoir

Endings. . .

After a quarter century of training, the day is finally here. . . I am finished with residency. I have so much to say and so many emotions that I cannot even express them all, especially because I need to go pick up my son and start my three week summer of being a "fun mommy." We actually had graduation a few weeks back, but since I had 3 weeks to make up from maternity leave, I didn't want to post anything- it just didn't feel right yet. It has been a long haul, very long haul. So many people on the outside think it seems to have gone fast (especially the last 3-7 years), but those close to me would disagree. It has been quite a journey. It is even interesting to see how life has changed while I have finished the medical part of my training. 7 years ago, I was almost ready to start medical school after working hard for 4 years on a degree and record that would get me into a good medical school. Brandon and I were newly married (and he had just started a new, first job). We lived in an apartment in Iowa City, IA, where we knew no one. Since that time we have made countless friends, been in 2 other houses (even remodeled ie: gutted the first one), have had and given away a dog, had an amazing son, traveled many miles for away rotations/to visit family, lost way too many hours of sleep, could fill a swimming pool with the number of tears shed, and have been changed by God and his hand in all of it. The finality is amazing- I have finally realized my dream of being Dr. Mom. I really am speechless, but I will leave you with a few thank yous (some stolen from my graduation speech).

To our friends, in Iowa, Denver, Omaha, and around the world, thank you for supporting me and loving me throughout this painful journey.

To my class- you are all amazing, thank you for being in the trenches with me, covering my back, for growing, laughing, crying, complaining, and being with me through it all.

To Matt and Maria- thanks for the countless meals, lodging, supportive ear for me and my family. Thanks for the free child care, countless gifts, and for loving me and my family as part of your own

To Scott and Vicki, thanks for the millions of prayers lifted on my behalf

To Miranda, my sister, thanks for the constant encouragement, advice, and love, you mean the world to me

To BJ my son, thanks for teaching me what is important in life, you are such an amazing demonstration of God's love for us.

To my parents, especially my mom, my best friend, for the never-ending support. You both inspire me to always do my best, never doubting I could do it (at least not out loud), for lending a listening ear. You two are incredible.

To my husband, Brandon, who by this time could probably pass the boards himself after supporting me through college, medical school, and residency. I could not have done any of it without you. You are my life, my love. Thank you for your sacrifices for my dream, and for loving me even on my ugly post-call days. You have blessed my life, more than you’ll ever know.